But...

This is so hard.

It's a cycle.  The pain.  The hurt.  The verbal abuse.

It continues.

Then there's an apology.  And I forgive.  We move on.

Like it never happened.

Except it did.  Again.  And again.  And again.

When is enough, enough?  Will it ever be?

I want to do what's right.  I want to honor the vows I made. 

I still love him.

But...

There's a "but".

And that scares me.